It's been awhile....

Here at Feminists for Colbert, we seemed to have dropped the ball...alas, we have been quite busy, one of us graduated, one of us had a baby--a new Colbert devotee--and one of us went on sabbatical....and dropping the ball was not all of our fault, there was that writer's strike which prevented Colbert from coming to our turf--we even had a feminist interning for him so we could be in his inner circle!

However, HUGE HUGE HUGE news! WE ARE GOING TO MEET STEPHEN COLBERT!!! That's right! In March, two members of the Feminists for Colbert team will embark on a trip to the mystical land called "New York City" and will attend a taping and get a special VIP visit with Colbert!!!

How did this wonderfulness happen? Did it have to do with our wooing of Stephen? Um, no, it didn't... A lovely man by the name of McAlister awarded one of our lovely contributors with this special prize pack for watching the stuff he won at a charity auction.

Anyway, we are coming March 4th! Let the countdown begin!

The Colbert ReportMon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c

The Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act

Colbert Report Full Episodes
Funny Political News

Christian Bale Parody
Joke of the Day

Colbert: Amazing, as always

If you didn't see Colbert on Monday, be sure to check out this Huffington Post article that reports the whole story and includes clips of Stephen's interview with Civil Rights legend Andrew Young, who worked to end the Charleston Hospital workers' strike--right here in Charleston--in 1969 with Stephen Colbert's dad.

The article starts by saying,

Stephen Colbert is a great entertainer, but the reason he has resonated so strongly with audiences particularly during this administration is because he has a core of earnestness that deeply reflects a strong moral sense and a desire to educate, illuminate, and do good works.

Damn straight. That's why we've got a whole feminist blog devoted to him.

Celebrity of the year!

Stephen Colbert has just been named Celebrity of the Year by the Associated Press. We've missed him during the writers' strike, so it's exciting to hear that he got this honor, and he emailed the AP to tell them this:

In receiving this award, I am pleased that I was chosen over two great spinners of fantasy — J.K. Rowling and Al Gore. It is truly an honor to be named the Associated Press’ Celebrity of the Year. Best of all, this makes me the official front-runner for next year’s Drug-Fueled Downward Spiral of the year. P.S. Look for my baby bump this spring!

He was chosen because of his influence on pop culture this year.

Fellow feminist blogger from Louisville

This just in: we've been teased (in a really affectionate way, imo) by Lauren, a feminist blogger from Louisville. Here's what she had to say:

Hey Ladies,

I hope you all don't get mad about this, but I've been following your Feminists for Colbert blog for a little while. I have a blog that's connected to a weekly newspaper in Louisville, KY and I'm sort of their token Feminist blogger. Also, I tend to write a lot about Stephen Colbert.

So, please don't get mad. I wrote a blog about you all and that guy at Comedy Central Insider who made those nasty comments. But, I kind of poked fun at you all, too. So... Don't take it too seriously. Just thought you'd like to know. Here's the link to the blog.

Hope you all don't hate me. I was just trying to be funny.

Love your blog by the way.

Lauren

We don't hate you, Lauren! We know that you love us. In fact, we think that guy at Comedy Central might love us, too. The jury's still out on how Stephen Colbert feels about us.

Colbert's coming to Charleston sooner than we thought!

Charleston Stage PresentsStephen Colbert’s Holiday ApparitionI Am Charleston (And So Can You!) Sunday, December 23rd at The Sottile Theatre at 7pm Charleston’s favorite son is coming home for the holidays! Yes, Stephen Colbert, America’s favorite know-it-all, political pundit and Wiz-Kid, returns to Charleston (The Capital of Colbert Nation) for an exclusive appearance in Stephen Colbert’s Holiday Apparition, a benefit for Charleston Stage.Stephen Colbert’s Holiday Apparition will include a reading from Stephen’s best selling new book: I Am America (And So Can You!), which is currently The New York Times number one bestseller, an interview about growing up in Charleston, and his journey from Charleston to Chicago’s Second City Improv Troupe to his hit Comedy Central series, The Colbert Report. Stephen’s rare appearance will conclude with a Q & A session with the audience. Proceeds from Stephen Colbert’s Holiday Apparition will benefit Charleston Stage and its extensive arts-education programs, which reach over 20,000 Lowcountry youth each year.Get Your Tickets Now Before This Special EventIs Announced to the Public!

TICKET PRICES

VIP Tickets: $250 per personIncludes passes to Wassail With Stephen Holiday Party (Hurry! There are only 50 VIP Tickets!)

Regular Tickets: $75 per person

Student Tickets: $25 per person (Hurry! Numbers are limited!)

No Stephen, No!

According the The New York Times: S.C. Democrats Say No to Colbert

"GREENVILLE, S.C. — The momentum of the Colbert presidential campaign hit a cul-de-sac today when the South Carolina Democratic Party decided he wasn’t a serious candidate and turned down his application to get on the ballot.

...the party’s executive council just voted 13-3 not to certify him.

Carol Fowler, chairwoman of the state party, told us that the council “really agonized over this because they really like him, they love his show and everyone thinks it’s wonderful that he cares about us.”"

Stephen Colbert, we still love you here in Charleston, even though you've stood us up like 50 million times so far and you still haven't gotten in that skirt for Skirt Magazine.

Don't tell anyone, but this feminist is still waiting by the phone for you.

Breaking News!

Stephen Colbert is in Charleston. On a carriage. Dressed as Uncle Sam. Give me one hour and I will track him down and force him into a skirt.


We are on to you, Stephen Colbert. See you around lunchtime, say, Market Street?

Heartbreaking guest post from Sticky Fingers!

Chad Walldorf of Sticky Fingers wrote in today with this heartbreaking news:

I feel terrible for not letting you know before the fact but thought it better to hear from us....our shared idol stopped by to Sticky Fingers on Saturday night to pay homage to his portrait(s) and do some politicking....I've attached some photos. He worked the room - even kissed a baby - gave a funny stump speech extolling the virtues of South Carolina's barbecue, shrimp, and peaches, did a short interview with me and then sat down to have dinner with his extended family (in-laws and siblings included).

The coolest thing was that the table next to him was a table of guys from the Air Force who were visting a buddy stationed in Charleston - he brought them in to see the portrait cause they were huge fans of the show and they obviously got way more than they bargained for. I told Colbert so he bought them a round of drinks and then took pictures with them so they were completely stoked. The only thing missing were the Feminists for Colbert and I apologize for not having thought to let you know he was coming. I'm hopeful that they will be back and if so we will try and let you know in advance of the visit.

Chad

Okay, Chad, because you wrote so nicely to tell us this news yourself, we'll forgive you on one condition: ribs, Chad, we need RIBS! You know there's nothing feminists like more than delicious barbecued ribs! Well, equality between the sexes--but second to that, it's ribs.

And just wait 'til we get our sticky fingers all over that unfaithful Stephen Colbert, who came to Charleston and didn't even seek us out.

My Heart is Broken!

Everyone here at Feminists for Colbert was REALLY REALLY excited about this coming Saturday as Stephen Colbert was going to be at the College of Charleston for Rock the Vote, but today he canceled! How could you do this to us Stephen!? We were making a banner for you, hoping for a hug, waiting for you to sign our copies of I am America (and So Can You), and Margaret was going to force you to wear a skirt in Skirt! (see post from 10/23/07).

The only thing that can stop our flood of tears and collective sighs is for Stephen to wear that skirt in Skirt!

It's Official:

to get on our ballot, you need to get in our skirt:
(or our skirts...)

do it Stephen, do it!

Would all FFC fans please post this wherever they can - on their own blogs, lesser Colbert fansites, college bulletin boards - we need to show some skirt+Stephen luuuuurvve.

Colbie on Meet the Press

Why Colbert is (sort of) running for president

This makes me feel a little awkward. But still hot for Colbert.

Calling Colbert:

We have another (better) dare for the Colbert:

If you are so insistent on running in South Carolina, you must prove your political and fashion prowess. If Hillary is wearing the pants, shouldn't you wear the skirt? Wear a skirt in skirt! and reach every American, near and far. Because everyone reads skirt!, and everyone wants to see you in (a) skirt!.

You won't be the only one, but you could be the best one (unless Superman came along...).

Come live out your mantasy and get into a skirt, we'll even provide the bongos.

Colbert for President? Yes, please!

Last night, Stephen announced his intention to run for President in South Carolina. We here at FFC are thrilled! We hope this "favorite son" pays us a visit when he comes to Charleston in January. Perhaps our efforts could be rewarded with tickets to the show?

Now, back to making campaign banners...

A Mock Columnist, Amok... ?

Our dear, sweet, sexy, titillating, and seductive deity has written a column (via Maureen Dowd) for the NY Times. Maureen says she "called Colbert with a dare: if he thought it was so easy to be a Times Op-Ed pundit, he should try it. He came right over.”

I will post it here for your viewing pleasure:

I Am an Op-Ed Columnist (And So Can You!)

By STEPHEN COLBERT

Surprised to see my byline here, aren’t you? I would be too, if I read The New York Times. But I don’t. So I’ll just have to take your word that this was published. Frankly, I prefer emoticons to the written word, and if you disagree :(

I’d like to thank Maureen Dowd for permitting/begging me to write her column today. As I type this, she’s watching from an overstuffed divan, petting her prize Abyssinian and sipping a Dirty Cosmotinijito. Which reminds me: Before I get started, I have to take care of one other bit of business:

Bad things are happening in countries you shouldn’t have to think about. It’s all George Bush’s fault, the vice president is Satan, and God is gay.

There. Now I’ve written Frank Rich’s column too.

So why I am writing Miss Dowd’s column today? Simple. Because I believe the 2008 election, unlike all previous elections, is important. And a lot of Americans feel confused about the current crop of presidential candidates.

For instance, Hillary Clinton. I can’t remember if I’m supposed to be scared of her so Democrats will think they should nominate her when she’s actually easy to beat, or if I’m supposed to be scared of her because she’s legitimately scary.

Or Rudy Giuliani. I can’t remember if I’m supposed to support him because he’s the one who can beat Hillary if she gets nominated, or if I’m supposed to support him because he’s legitimately scary.

And Fred Thompson. In my opinion “Law & Order” never sufficiently explained why the Manhattan D.A. had an accent like an Appalachian catfish wrestler.

Well, suddenly an option is looming on the horizon. And I don’t mean Al Gore (though he’s a world-class loomer). First of all, I don’t think Nobel Prizes should go to people I was seated next to at the Emmys. Second, winning the Nobel Prize does not automatically qualify you to be commander in chief. I think George Bush has proved definitively that to be president, you don’t need to care about science, literature or peace.

While my hat is not presently in the ring, I should also point out that it is not on my head. So where’s that hat? (Hint: John McCain was seen passing one at a gas station to fuel up the Straight Talk Express.)

Others point to my new bestseller, “I Am America (And So Can You!)” noting that many candidates test the waters with a book first. Just look at Barack Obama, John Edwards or O. J. Simpson.

Look at the moral guidance I offer. On faith: “After Jesus was born, the Old Testament basically became a way for Bible publishers to keep their word count up.” On gender: “The sooner we accept the basic differences between men and women, the sooner we can stop arguing about it and start having sex.” On race: “While skin and race are often synonymous, skin cleansing is good, race cleansing is bad.” On the elderly: “They look like lizards.”

Our nation is at a Fork in the Road. Some say we should go Left; some say go Right. I say, “Doesn’t this thing have a reverse gear?” Let’s back this country up to a time before there were forks in the road — or even roads. Or forks, for that matter. I want to return to a simpler America where we ate our meat off the end of a sharpened stick.

Let me regurgitate: I know why you want me to run, and I hear your clamor. I share Americans’ nostalgia for an era when you not only could tell a man by the cut of his jib, but the jib industry hadn’t yet fled to Guangdong. And I don’t intend to tease you for weeks the way Newt Gingrich did, saying that if his supporters raised $30 million, he would run for president. I would run for 15 million. Cash.

Nevertheless, I am not ready to announce yet — even though it’s clear that the voters are desperate for a white, male, middle-aged, Jesus-trumpeting alternative.

What do I offer? Hope for the common man. Because I am not the Anointed or the Inevitable. I am just an Average Joe like you — if you have a TV show.

And now we at FFC have a dare: Colbert, we would permit/beg you to write a blog entry for us as well. I'm sure you could whip up some self-love for us. Because you are our favorite Average Joe (who, yes, happens to have a TV show).

xoxo FFC

Coming soon: Feminists Crush on Colbert

We at FFC wanted to give you the heads-up that soon we will be featuring a series of guest bloggers, starting with Conseula from Afrogeek Mom and Dad. Perhaps she'll blog about how ungodly hot Colbert is in that photo. I may be a tiny bit obsessed.

Update: Additional crushing coming soon--Margie P, of Under My Skirt and In My Head, will also be a guest blogger...stay tuned.

Colbert in Vanity Fair

Check out the latest issue of Vanity Fair for an article about Colbert. Feminists for Colbert were interviewed for this article, and although we didn't make it in, it's still pretty interesting (and the author, Seth Mnookin, is a really nice guy--and young! Check him out here).

I know it's not particularly feminist to objectify men, but doesn't Colbert look excellent in this photo?

MNRAC reclaims Mt Hood for Colbert Nation

I'll keep it simple and straightforward; albeit I still hate facts. My friends and I are outdoor nuts who worship Colbert and have begun a conquest around the world to summit mountains, renaming them for the Colbert Nation.

1 down...434 to go. Here is our first video.

I'll have an alternative GoogleVideo address and a Myspacevideo web address tomorrow.


Hope you take a look and enjoy and you have my full permission (and encouragement!) to post. I would even send you a copy of our videos if you like.

Thanks for making it this far and for all the work you do on your site.

Gareth Charles

Update from the No Fact Zone

Hey folks, we're all envying you being there in Charleston -- we wanted to make sure you knew why!

Click here...

WordsWithGrace
from Colbert University (colbertuniversity.nofactzone.net)
and No Fact Zone (nofactzone.net)

Feminism = Pole Dancing?

--A guest post from Taylor, FFC staffer

On this past Monday's episode of the Colbert Report, Stephen gained back some of the love he had tainted and crushed by not mentioning our blog or wearing the Full Frontal Feminism t-shirt we at FFC sent him when Jessica Valenti was on the show. How did he do this? A little segment called "Difference Makers."

As a segue into the segment, Stephen noted that he believes women should have the same rights as men, and he publicized the fact that women only make $0.77 for every dollar a man makes for performing the same job with the same qualifications (incidentally, in his home state and ours, South Carolina, white women only make $0.72 for every dollar, and women of color make even less). Then he made a "note to self" to hire more women...

But the best part is the "Difference Maker" herself, Johnna Mink. Johnna would like to be "a role model for other women." How does she attempt to achieve this? Well, by teaching "pole dancing for the real woman" of course! Noting it's not your "typical feminism," but "if feminism is empowering, then pole dancing is feminist." Cut to Mink spinning -- "the most empowering" move--spread eagle on a pole.

One student of Mink's notes that classic feminist pursuits have been fighting for the right to vote and equal pay stuff, but pole dancing is better than classical feminism! It's "sexy and allows one to tap into their sensual creature."

So, thank you, Johnna Mink the "Susan B. Anthony of pole dancing." You have, as the manager of Larry Flynt's Hustler club said, "Put the feminine back in feminism." You have changed the idea that feminists are "hairy, butch, nasty lesbians," by reminding us to "point our toes," "use our hair" and "raise our hips" and allowed men not to "feel like pigs" for watching women spin spread eagle on poles.

Pole-dancing, feminism, and more reasons to love Colbert

Things have been a little slow around FFC this summer (in our defense, it is like a million degrees here, and everything moves a little slower). We were working on a post about Colbert's recent expose of the pole dancing feminist, but then we saw that Jenn Pozner of WIMN's Voices has already done it. Check out Jenn's recent post which includes clips from the show as well as a shout out to US!